Human
Kenya
****************
Well That Was Fun
Seriously Kenya..
Sorry.
Are you?
No.
I was trying to be nice!
That was your first mistake.
Just kidding, I appreciate it.. Really I do! But when I saw them I felt complete.
Aww.
Actually I take back that aww - I spent a half hour trying to catch your boney little ass in the basement.
I was worried about Sebby or Cubby freaking out and smacking you upside the head - But I swear they did not even see you go past them!
I should have been a Cheetah.
I was thinking more along the lines of Road Runner, but Cheetah works.
You almost shut the door on my head you know!
Of course I know - I was standing right there trying to stop you from running out of my room.
Don`t mess with a Grandmas need to be with her family.
Clearly!
So should we talk first about the day or how I had to catch you?
Well, I prefer the readers to leave with a sense of love and family...not of dumb ass cat shenanigans.
Catching it is.
So Cheetah books it through the house and into the basement.
Normally Onyx and Molly hang out down there, but at that point they were playing in the box in the living room.
I shut the door to the basement so she could not do an about face and try to book it back up to the room.
Clearly I was confused and scared.
I would think so, since your target location was 15 feet away from my room and not 2 flights down behind a Christmas tree!
You should get rid of that.
I should, it makes for a fantastic bad cat hideout.
I move the tree and you run to the other side of the basement, behind the dryer.
I get you to run out of that spot because I can not reach you.
Yeah, what are you a Witch? Enough with the broom!
I didn't even touch you with it!
Anyways.. you run back to the stupid tree, then under the stairs, through the stairs to the landing, back to the tree then back behind the dryer, then into a box under the table.
I should never have given you that idea.
Technically you got what you wanted in the end so maybe it was a good idea.
Of course you ran out of the box - but I took the box to the next location.
Okay that was a stupid location.
I agree, the only way past me was through me.
I was thinking about attempting to go over you.
Well good thing you did not or you could still be down there.
You wedged your silly ass between the wall and the stairs.
My plan was to grab you - which I had tried previously but you are a sly and squirmy little feline.
I have been working on it for awhile.
You looked like you were going to lunge at me any second.
I wasn't.
I could see you contemplating whether or not your nails were long enough to draw blood.
That may have crossed my mind.
Well I was not going to wait for your brain to catch up with your body so I scruffed you and put you in the box.
Normally I enjoy boxes - not so much this time.
Well I am guessing the box is normally not closed.
True.
I then carried you back to my room - in the box.
I betcha Sebby wanted to check out inside the box.
I think I had a train of meows following me up to my room.
I did not enjoy the ride. I want my money back.
No refunds.
Okay now we can talk about the good parts.
I got to see my family!
I had not seen them since you live trapped me.
I know, but I had to wait until you were healed.
*This visit was prior to the big chase scene.
The little ones have grown, they are so beautiful!
And my baby, my baby looks healthy!
She was so skinny last time I saw her.
Not eating does that.
Yeah that was horrible.
Just look at her little ones! they are thriving now!
They are cute little monkeys.
You do realize it has only been 2 weeks since you were live trapped.
Feels like forever. I could smell them but I didn't know for sure if they were here, or if they were okay.
I could tell you felt better with your whole family together.
I did. So why did you take them away again?
Well, you are on a special food. One for your gastrointestinal issues.
So?
So I was not ready to transition you to their food yet.
Why couldn't we all just eat my food?
I didn't even want you eating your food!
Huh?
The food was good for an upset system, easy on the digestive tract. That is where the goodness ended.
You were not actually gaining weight on that food. It was not meant for a long term diet - and the others would have not benefited from eating it.
I guess I see your predicament.
Thank you, I did not want to keep you from your family.
So this was a win-win situation?
It ended up as one.
Now we get to talk about the next capture.
You are very dramatic.
Says the Cheetah.
Touche.
I was waiting for you.
Yup.
You positioned yourself directly behind the door so I could not see where you were.
I knew you were there. I'm not new.
You tried this tactic a few times. Each time resulting in a battle at the door.
Door battle Champion.
Yeah yeah, you win...well actually.
You won.
Yes I did.
I decided that I was going to move you back with your family.
I mixed a bit of your food with their food - I am expecting some not so fantastic bathroom breaks in your future.
It's worth it.
Now, I had to get you into the carrier or carry you to the room.
If only I understood human.
It would be helpful
We did a bit of a chase, but you had nowhere to go really. So I just needed a way to get you, without freaking you out more than you already were.
I think I believed you were going to torture me or something else a cat would normally think.
I would never ever do that!
Part of me knows that.. the other part is a cat.
Well you went into the scratching tower with the 2 holes .
One Kenya - packed and ready for shipment.
Pretty much! I put a pillow over the hole and turned the tower on its side and brought the whole thing into the other room.
It was a bit of an ordeal but...
You do look happy.
I am.
I am the Matriarch of the family.
I could not have them in the same house and be separated from them.
They are my family.
Adoptions should be fun.
It will be okay.
I know they have to go, they will have new families.
They will be safe and loved and that is all I can ask or hope for.
But while they are here, I need to be with them.
Kenya.
Yes?
You have a beautiful family.
I know.
Thank you - we all thank you.
Actually I take back that aww - I spent a half hour trying to catch your boney little ass in the basement.
I was worried about Sebby or Cubby freaking out and smacking you upside the head - But I swear they did not even see you go past them!
I should have been a Cheetah.
I was thinking more along the lines of Road Runner, but Cheetah works.
You almost shut the door on my head you know!
Of course I know - I was standing right there trying to stop you from running out of my room.
Don`t mess with a Grandmas need to be with her family.
Clearly!
So should we talk first about the day or how I had to catch you?
Well, I prefer the readers to leave with a sense of love and family...not of dumb ass cat shenanigans.
Catching it is.
So Cheetah books it through the house and into the basement.
Normally Onyx and Molly hang out down there, but at that point they were playing in the box in the living room.
I shut the door to the basement so she could not do an about face and try to book it back up to the room.
Clearly I was confused and scared.
I would think so, since your target location was 15 feet away from my room and not 2 flights down behind a Christmas tree!
You should get rid of that.
I should, it makes for a fantastic bad cat hideout.
I move the tree and you run to the other side of the basement, behind the dryer.
I get you to run out of that spot because I can not reach you.
Yeah, what are you a Witch? Enough with the broom!
I didn't even touch you with it!
Anyways.. you run back to the stupid tree, then under the stairs, through the stairs to the landing, back to the tree then back behind the dryer, then into a box under the table.
I should never have given you that idea.
Technically you got what you wanted in the end so maybe it was a good idea.
Of course you ran out of the box - but I took the box to the next location.
Okay that was a stupid location.
I agree, the only way past me was through me.
I was thinking about attempting to go over you.
Well good thing you did not or you could still be down there.
You wedged your silly ass between the wall and the stairs.
My plan was to grab you - which I had tried previously but you are a sly and squirmy little feline.
I have been working on it for awhile.
You looked like you were going to lunge at me any second.
I wasn't.
I could see you contemplating whether or not your nails were long enough to draw blood.
That may have crossed my mind.
Well I was not going to wait for your brain to catch up with your body so I scruffed you and put you in the box.
Normally I enjoy boxes - not so much this time.
Well I am guessing the box is normally not closed.
True.
I then carried you back to my room - in the box.
I betcha Sebby wanted to check out inside the box.
I think I had a train of meows following me up to my room.
I did not enjoy the ride. I want my money back.
No refunds.
Okay now we can talk about the good parts.
I got to see my family!
I had not seen them since you live trapped me.
I know, but I had to wait until you were healed.
*This visit was prior to the big chase scene.
The little ones have grown, they are so beautiful!
And my baby, my baby looks healthy!
She was so skinny last time I saw her.
Not eating does that.
Yeah that was horrible.
Just look at her little ones! they are thriving now!
They are cute little monkeys.
You do realize it has only been 2 weeks since you were live trapped.
Feels like forever. I could smell them but I didn't know for sure if they were here, or if they were okay.
I could tell you felt better with your whole family together.
I did. So why did you take them away again?
Well, you are on a special food. One for your gastrointestinal issues.
So?
So I was not ready to transition you to their food yet.
Why couldn't we all just eat my food?
I didn't even want you eating your food!
Huh?
The food was good for an upset system, easy on the digestive tract. That is where the goodness ended.
You were not actually gaining weight on that food. It was not meant for a long term diet - and the others would have not benefited from eating it.
I guess I see your predicament.
Thank you, I did not want to keep you from your family.
So this was a win-win situation?
It ended up as one.
Now we get to talk about the next capture.
You are very dramatic.
Says the Cheetah.
Touche.
I was waiting for you.
Yup.
You positioned yourself directly behind the door so I could not see where you were.
I knew you were there. I'm not new.
You tried this tactic a few times. Each time resulting in a battle at the door.
Door battle Champion.
Yeah yeah, you win...well actually.
You won.
Yes I did.
I decided that I was going to move you back with your family.
I mixed a bit of your food with their food - I am expecting some not so fantastic bathroom breaks in your future.
It's worth it.
Now, I had to get you into the carrier or carry you to the room.
If only I understood human.
It would be helpful
We did a bit of a chase, but you had nowhere to go really. So I just needed a way to get you, without freaking you out more than you already were.
I think I believed you were going to torture me or something else a cat would normally think.
I would never ever do that!
Part of me knows that.. the other part is a cat.
Well you went into the scratching tower with the 2 holes .
One Kenya - packed and ready for shipment.
Pretty much! I put a pillow over the hole and turned the tower on its side and brought the whole thing into the other room.
It was a bit of an ordeal but...
You do look happy.
I am.
I am the Matriarch of the family.
I could not have them in the same house and be separated from them.
They are my family.
Adoptions should be fun.
It will be okay.
I know they have to go, they will have new families.
They will be safe and loved and that is all I can ask or hope for.
But while they are here, I need to be with them.
Kenya.
Yes?
You have a beautiful family.
I know.
Thank you - we all thank you.
 |
| That Box makes my butt look big |
 |
| Family |
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