Twas The Night Before Christmas ...

*******
Human
Sebby
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Twas the night before Christmas 

-twas is a stupid word

And all through the house

-what if people live in an apartment?

Not a creature was stirring 

- who would trust a creature to stir? It would have to be boiled cabbage for us not to quit stirring and eat.

Not even a mouse

-mmm mouse stew

The stockings were hung

-stockings like socks? That would be a fantastic use for all of humans random lone socks

On the chimney with care

- this story sucks, wtf is a chimney?

In hopes that Saint Nicholas

- saint? Big dude in a costume is a saint?

Soon would be there

- Santas coming????

Forget everything I just said. 

Saint Santa is awesome.. I will stir the cabbage.

I will build a chimney!

Sebby!
What!
Shut up!
No!
Then I am not finishing the story. 

Good. It was stupid anyways. 
I have a better one. 
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It was.. I mean.. Twas a dark and stormy night
-Oh so now 'twas' is okay?
Santa was trying to fly his sleigh. 
-Santa is a pilot ?
But the storm was just too um.. stormy!
He needed help.
-You need help.
The reindeer were complaining, saying it was scary and they did want to fly.
Santa needed a hero.
-Oh let me guess..
He texted the only one he could trust. 
Super Sebby I need your help!
Would you help me fly my sleigh tonight!
Super Sebby said absolutely
-But he had to say no. 
What? no he didn't!
-Yes he did!
This is my story!!
-Maybe. But Super Sebby is not allowed outside. 
He went anyways!
-How? he can't open the door!
He went out the chimney ...so be quiet! 
-Fine.. finish your story. 
No, forget it. You ruined it. 
-We don't have a chimney. 
Sometimes you're just mean.