Pet me, pet me now!

(Human Rocky)
Seriously, why are you not petting me?

Because I am typing.
Well do that on your own time. This is my time. I want to be petted. 

I pet you constantly !

Not enough!

Maybe if you would stop rubbing up against the computer screen, causing me to stop typing.. to fix it... maybe I would have more time!

But I own it.

No you don't!

Clearly you are mistaken. 
According to Cat Rule #477 - Ownership

• If you rub up against it on a continuous basis
• If your scent is clearly indicated on said object
• If you want it

Then you are the owner. 

You just made that up.

No I did not!

Prove it!

You prove it!

Well I do not follow your rules.

Clearly. 

Btw this does not mean you can stop petting me.

Thank you, that was a fantastic back scratch. 
More.

Nudging my hand will not help.

What about this?

Stop rubbing on the corner of the damn computer screen !

Then pet me!

No!

Seriously?? Now you think trying to walk on the keys will get you more pets?

I gots to try.

You gots to stop!

I will stop when you pet me. 

But then you will start again when I stop petting you.

Then keep petting me. 

Arg!

Blarg!

Rocky, enough already.

Never enough.

You wake me up at 4 am... then again at like 6..I swear you try and wake me up like 5 times a night!

Nooo.

Pawing at me will not get more pets either.

STOP!

NO!

You are driving me batty!

Well you are driving me catty!

Stop looking at me like that.

Like what?

Like I never pay any attention to you.

In cat time.. you don't.

In cat time? WTF is cat time.

ALL TIME IS CAT TIME.

You're ridiculous.

Why cant you just sit down ...stop it.. stop it ssssssssssssssssssssssssttttttttttttttttttttttttooooop it!

That's it. I am not petting you for 10 minutes.

What? You think I can't go without pets for 10 minutes?. 
8:07

8:17
That was easy!

So you can sit still.. you just choose not to?

I don't know what you are talking about. Clearly I am in total control at all times. 

Good to know.
So when you start being a pain in the ass I can just ignore you.

Uh...
Brb.

Is that Sebby on the other side of the door? What is he telling you?

Nothing.. He just wanted to know how I am doing. 

Btw, Cat Rule #213 - Ignoring 

If a human attempts to ignore you, you are entitled to react by:

• meowing
• purring
• rubbing up against them
• walking on their computer
• walking on their hair
• pawing at them
• sitting on their phone
• attempting to chew on power cords
• accidentally flipping water or food bowls
• releasing noxious gasses

So it's up to you. 
I suggest.. pet me.
I need another room.